Digital security risks for lower ranking Decepticons on Earth
Content rating: Mature
Warnings: Bad ethics, Vortex's implied snuff fetish.
Summary: An essay by Breakdown of Cybertron. Digital technician apprentice. As practice for level 1 certification. Annotation by Calculus of Tarn, tutor and Digital technician level 5.
Notes:
My first go at a non-narrative work. I had fun with this one I think. I had to actually try hard to write a bad essay, even though this was pretend I kept going into citation and good phrasing mode. XD
Introduction
Digital security refers to the safety of a given Cybertronian’s internal software systems, or the systems of external devices such as data-pads(ref?). Risks to digital security can vary from common viruses to Autobot spyware (Soundwave, 4.503AW). Lower ranking Decepticons refers to any individual who does not command other Decepticons(ref?).
Earth is the common name for planet SOL-2341-PL-3, first discovered by Starscream of Vos as recorded in The Stella Records of Iacon (4.425PW).
In this essay it is argued that the main digital security risk to lower ranking Decepticons on Earth originates with hummus.
[Your first paragraph needs work. There should be more references here, I’ve indicated where. Remember, if you’re making an argument or a statement it needs a reference!
The third sentence could be improved to include more specific and accurate language to describe ranks. I.e. any Decepticon who is not an officer such as a private.
Good to see you using Stella notation as I instructed!
In the last paragraph, the correct phrasing would be humans. But you’ve improved your proofreading a lot since your last essay.]
Risks
To discuss risks they must first be categorised by threat level. According to commander Shockwave’s Digital Risks at War (4.501AW), any digital security threat that originates with the Autobots is the most important to focus upon for personal safety.
However, Starscream (4.502AW) in ‘a response to foolishness’ argues that Earth is not Cybertron, cannot be modelled after Cybertron, and therefore has a different array of security threats. Starscream (4.502AW) does not provide any data in his retort.
So, to assess digital security risks and their threat level for lower ranking Decepticons data must be collected. Data could not be collected in person, so data was collected via a comm message that contained a survey.
Of the 50 mechs messaged, 20 did not respond. Of the 20 who did not respond to the survey, 5 read the data collection terms of service in full and 15 in part.
[Much better use of referencing here! Collecting data the correct approach, and remembering your Decepticon privacy protection rules here well. If they signed it, the data is yours! (Forgive the rough paraphrasing of Soundwave’s 23rd amendment to the Decepticon law codex.)
But you should include more discussion of potential bias in your methodology and how you plan to address them.]
Results
All raw results from participants have been attached to this file. The results of most common security risks have been processed and turned into this chart.
As can be seen in this bar chart, reported incident related to humans are the most commonly recorded. Next are incidents related to unknown viruses, many may be ‘neutral’ or pre-war viruses that are not engineered for war. Viral incidents related to other Decepticons occur, but usually in response to interpersonal issues and with low risk to digital security. I.e. mild cases of shuttle shakes and paint nanite reprogramming.
Incidents related to Autobots are very low and there is some duplicity in accounts of such.
As quoted by one participant,
“I saw Mirage's jucy valve and it infected my brain :P”
- Skywarp of Vos (rank: command trine third.)
The other, Wildrider (rank: Stunticon solider), was impossible to parse logically so was also considered duplicitous.
Human related incidents were recorded to involve the human internet. Many mechs attribute this to looking for human media, but are vague about the exact details. Except Vortex of Kaon (rank: interrogator) who was very explicit, details of this have been omitted from the essay as adult human multinational and death isn’t relevant to this essays questions.
Websites that contain illegal content are more likely to cause viral issues compared to reports of more mundane content. It is possible that human spyware could remain in mechs systems for many days as many report being unwell for up to a week. (Ref?)
[Give more quotes from mechs who gave useful information. They may not be exciting but they’re still good sources. Also do not write about Vortex, he will make it weird later. Trust me. Think you meant mutilation.
But do include Skywarp’s quote if only to see Starscream’s reaction.
Critique that last statement more. Ask Soundwave for records of who regularly takes a sickie to confirm if these mechs are making slag up then write your critique of the responses using that. Check with Hook about how long earth viruses take to be eradicated from systems—I know you can’t go in person easily, so comm message them.]
Conclusion
Humans are the most common recorded cause of security risk in lower ranking Decepticons.
However, more research is needed as only 30 mechs responded. A higher response level would mean more data to study and check results. A survey of Cybertroninan data security could also be done to compare results and perhaps put to rest Starscream (4.502AW) VS Shockwave (4.501AW) VS Soundwave (4.503AW).
[Overall you did well. Only two wording mistakes. You need to use references more and not make any points you can’t back up.
Nice ambition but give it some technician levels. And keep that forcefield up, Starscream tends to be forceful with his responses—he’s knocked at least one rival out by throwing a heavy datapad before.]
References
Shockwave (4.501AW) Digital Risks at War - Cybertron, Darkmount.
Starscream (4.502AW) a response to foolishness - Earth, the Atlantic sea base,
Soundwave (4.503AW) response to the original and its response: Soundwave superior - Earth, the Atlantic sea base.
Stella Records of Iacon (4.425PW) SOL-2341-PL-3 Iacon, the Stella complex.